Orlando

I have been typing and deleting status updates on my personal facebook page about Orlando for days now. As soon as I think I want to share something about how I feel about the Orlando tragedy, I stop myself and delete it. At first I couldn't quite figure out why I didn't have the courage or as my husband would say the idiocy to post it, since I pretty much let it all hang out when posting on facebook anyways. But as I have thought, and prayed, and stewed, and gotten angry and sad, and read and watched all the information and all the opinions that have come out since the shooting in Orlando, I realized it is not about my personal opinion right now. Right now, the wound is still open and the pain is still unbearable for those that have lost the most. Who am I to spew my opinion on the public right now? I think we will have a time for that, and it is not now, but in the coming weeks and months. I have really had to get over myself with this. I am mad, I am angry, I want to blast folks on facebook and start keyboard warrior fights that will send my blood pressure through the roof. But when I have basically typed a whole dissertation in a status update, I have swallowed my pride and stopped myself. Because it is not about me. This is much more than me. This is everyone, and I have to take everyone into account before I try and make it about me with my stupid, anger filled status updates and political innuendos. We are hurting as a country right now. But mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and husbands and wives and children and grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins and friends in Orlando and around the country and world are hurting much more than us. They don't care about our politics right now. They don't care about how we feel. They don't care about that status update, and they don't care how many damn news articles you have shared in the last 24 hours. They are broken, and they hurt, and they are in the storm of grief that is overwhelming and heartbreaking. They need us to put down our opinions, our beliefs, our politics, our sides, and our egos. They need us to stand behind them, and show true compassion, which is going beyond yourself and caring for others that may not believe the same way you do, or feel the same way you do, or even vote the same way you do. We are so eager to turn on each other like rabid dogs. I have seen the division in the past couple of days so clearly. I have even taken part in it. And while I think debate is good and needed and necessary, now is not the time. Now is the time for standing behind the victims and the loved ones of this despicable act and tragedy. Now is the time for us to show our solidarity. Now is the time for us to show each other and the world the compassion that I know we have in this country. Now is the time for us to unify as one people, even if it is only for a short while. Now is the time to show that we can lay it all down and give love and compassion where it is needed. Orlando is not alone, because we are Orlando. Stanley Almodovar III, 23 years old Amanda Alvear, 25 years old Oscar A Aracena-Montero, 26 years old Rodolfo Ayala-Ayala, 33 years old Antonio Davon Brown, 29 years old Darryl Roman Burt II, 29 years old Angel L. Candelario-Padro, 28 years old Juan Chevez-Martinez, 25 years old Luis Daniel Conde, 39 years old Cory James Connell, 21 years old Tevin Eugene Crosby, 25 years old Deonka Deidra Drayton, 32 years old Simon Adrian Carrillo Fernandez, 31 years old Leroy Valentin Fernandez, 25 years old Mercedez Marisol Flores, 26 years old Peter O. Gonzalez-Cruz, 22 years old Juan Ramon Guerrero, 22 years old Paul Terrell Henry, 41 years old Frank Hernandez, 27 years old Miguel Angel Honorato, 30 years old Javier Jorge-Reyes, 40 years old Jason Benjamin Josaphat, 19 years old Eddie Jamoldroy Justice, 30 years old Anthony Luis Laureanodisla, 25 years old Christopher Andrew Leinonen, 32 years old Alejandro Barrios Martinez, 21 years old Brenda Lee Marquez McCool, 49 years old Gilberto Ramon Silva Menendez, 25 years old Kimberly Morris, 37 years old Akyra Monet Murray, 18 years old Luis Omar Ocasio-Capo, 20 years old Geraldo A. Ortiz-Jimenez, 25 years old Eric Ivan Ortiz-Rivera, 36 years old Joel Rayon Paniagua, 32 years old Jean Carlos Mendez Perez, 35 years old Enrique L. Rios, Jr., 25 years old Jean C. Nives Rodriguez, 27 years old Xavier Emmanuel Serrano Rosado, 35 years old Christopher Joseph Sanfeliz, 24 years old Yilmary Rodriguez Solivan, 24 years old Edward Sotomayor Jr., 34 years old Shane Evan Tomlinson, 33 years old Martin Benitez Torres, 33 years old Jonathan Antonio Camuy Vega, 24 years old Juan P. Rivera Velazquez, 37 years old Luis S. Vielma, 22 years old Franky Jimmy Dejesus Velazquez, 50 years old Luis Daniel Wilson-Leon, 37 years old Jerald Arthur Wright, 31 years old